Teaching Children Sarcasm ...

sar·casm - [sahr-kaz-uhm] noun. 1. harsh or bitter derision or irony. 2. a sharply ironical taunt; sneering or cutting remark.


I am very sarcastic. I always have been. I guess it is a byproduct of the environment I grew up in. It seems everyone in my family has the sarcasm bone and we tend to (over)use it everyday. It is a way of life; being a sarcastic person.

My wife doesn't get my sarcasm sometimes and she tends to get angry with me every now and then.  Sometimes even I have to retract my statements because I use my sarcasm when I respond to questions from my two year old without even thinking about it.  It's a sickness I know.

Part of me thinks that my nonchalant attitude and quick witted remarks will rub off on my son in a good way and make him less prone to being upset by peoples words in the future. Then there is another part of me that wishes he wouldn't have to build a tolerance for harsh statements. It isn't that I am particularly harsh towards him but sometimes I answer questions with questions and I say lighthearted things to him that could seem like insults.

One example is that when he wants to be carried rather than walk I say "sure I'll carry you ya lazy bum". I laugh when I say it and so does Ryker. My better half doesn't like that at all because it may be hurting his feelings. I totally understand her logic, but I can't stop myself from saying the phrase(It's just so funny when he laughs and says "my no lazy bum dada"). Maybe I should explain to him (when he is capable of understanding) that I don't really mean to hurt his feelings when I say things like that. It is just my way of getting him riled up and hopefully spur him to want to walk on his own just to prove me wrong.

Realistically he will have to build some sort of tolerance to the world and maybe I should be the one who helps him construct these "defense mechanisms". I can't in good conscience allow him to become vulnerable to beat downs from verbal bullies, so I should guide him in some way to become mentally strong.

I guess what I am getting at is that I want him to be strong while still retaining his positive mind. I want my son to still believe that people are filled with good intentions as a whole and that he can trust people; but he needs to be able to decipher the difference between good and bad.

How do you help your children become impervious to outside threats while still allowing them to maintain innocence? Is sarcasm a viable coping mechanism? Am I crazy for thinking that this is important? Like I have said before, dads just think differently. We can't help it.